Last night, I watched another brilliant documentary on BBC Three entitled “Reggie Yates’ Extreme UK: Men at War” about men who feel threatened by feminism. I was horrified that men feel that women’s rights are being discussed more than men’s because whilst they are, nothing’s being done for women. We still have FGM in the UK, we still have high levels of rape against women and women being blamed for it. This doesn’t mean I don’t understand where they’re coming from – except for you Roosh because you’re reply that the father should “give her a man to marry at a young age – 18. At least when she is 30, you have 3 or 4 grandkids.” is not good enough. Since when was this the 1900’s when a father decides on his daughter’s spouse and not her? I’m 18, I don’t want to get married, especially not just yet. You’re rape jokes are invasive and vile and you’re just a downright misogynist.
But enough about a derogatory imbecile’s archaic views about women. The other men who want men’s rights (actual men’s rights and not just things they used to have but now women do, too) to be discussed, I understand. Their views are what I believe are part of feminism. Even if false rape accusations are at only around 2%, they do need to be discussed. Women raping men and men raping men needs to be discussed. Just as much as men raping women does. All rape needs to be conditioned out of us from a young age and taught that it is not OK. Likewise, depression in men and men being allowed to express emotions without shame should be discussed and we need to remove the stigma around the issues around this, too. However, to me, this is part of true feminism – for men and women to be equal on a social and political level as far as biology will allow.
This brings me to the point of this post. We need, in the UK, a much better sex education. I felt foolish this week truly believing there was something wrong with me ‘down there’ only for the doctor to tell me that it was completely natural and normal, which I would have known if someone had told me that not all periods are exactly 28 days apart. This is a minor thing, but what happens when it comes to actual sex?
My neighbour told me something horrific yesterday. For legal reasons, she has asked I don’t say anything specific to the case at her school. All I will say is that a boy, under the age of 15, has committed a sexual crime. If this isn’t beaten out of him now, what will he be like when he’s in his 20’s? He is young and some may argue that he doesn’t know any better – but he should. The education system and his parents/guardians should have taught him that his actions were inappropriate and that is not how to treat other people. Do we want our young boys to think is acceptable to treat young girls like a piece of meat for their sexual gratification? Especially after the fight women have battled to be in control of their own bodies?
This is why we need a better sex ed. To empower young girls to know what is right and wrong, so they know that they can say no. To teach young boys that:
Likewise, we need to teach young children that women can, and have, raped men. That men can, and have, raped men. Basically, that men can be raped, too, and are more likely to suffer in silence because of the social repercussions. We need to remove this stigma from a young age. Not all men are rapists, and no one has ever said that, and if they are, then they’re idiots, just like the people who think we don’t need feminism.
I have been raised by incredibly open parents, where not much is off limits. As a result, I am quite comfortable in telling them that I need to get contraception. Also, they told me so much that it scared me off sex. I am 100% convinced my parents’ open-ness towards sex is why my sister (and I, until I got a very hot boyfriend) has done nothing. More sex education actually leads to less sex. People know what’s going on and then don’t feel obliged to go and find out for themselves and ending up on “16 and Pregnant” because they were never taught about contraception or because they weren’t really ready but they thought ‘That’s what a relationship is about, right?’.
I genuinely believe that the UK needs to bring about a proper sex education from year 5 and upwards (at an appropriate age level as we mature), teaching us about our bodies; what a healthy relationship is; sex for LGBTQ+ as well as heterosexual relationships. There should be a compulsory GCSE (as demonstrated in Channel 4’s “Sex In Class”) in it with similar rules to English and Maths – that is, if you don’t get at least a C, you have to resit the year. We cannot raise a generation of children who don’t know what’s going on with their bodies and resort to porn in order to find it out. Porn is fine, but only when people (particularly teenage boys) are taught that it is exaggerated and not real sex and girls don’t feel like that’s what they have to be or what they have to do. For instance the rise in young girls feeling like they have to engage in anal.
Thank you to the NSPCC for their ‘Underwear Rule’ and being a starting force in this much needed movement. Teaching children from a young age what is appropriate and what is not, in the same way as we teach them ‘don’t talk to strangers’. It is a brilliant campaign and will, hopefully, protect children.
Overall, this is why I feel that the UK government needs to give us a better sex ed. It is part of what feminism means to me. Men and women alike deserve and have a right to control their bodies. Nobody should ever feel forced into any sexual activity.
So, this is a plea to our Conservative government and David Cameron:
Most of you have children. Protect this country as you promised when you took a seat in Parliament. Please, make it compulsory across schools, academies, colleges and free-schools to have a sex education outlined by doctors, campaigners and sexual health advisers. One which covers all subjects to do with sex from periods and wet dreams to rape and consent. Make sure that no school can deviate or change any of the course to suit the religious or political views of any parents. Children need to know what’s going on, whether their parents agree or not. We deserve to have control of our bodies, but how can we if we don’t know what’s going on?
And if that doesn’t convince you, here are some scary statistics about rape:
And here’s an article to put the UK into perspective compared to other countries.
Sorry, I couldn’t resit…